The excerpts from Julia Kim’s Testimony  
on December 5, 2015

We have to fully realize that we are the sinners who crucified Jesus.

Praise Jesus! Praise the Blessed Mother!  

It’s nice to see you all. What is the life like on earth? While there are sadness, anguishes and conflicts, sometimes joy also comes to us. Good and evil are interwoven as every cloud has a silver lining. We tend to fall into despair and feel unhappy because we can’t FEEL the joy. We cross over the border of Heaven and Hell in proportion to how much we “FEEL” and how much we can offer up gracefully when something happens. (“FEEL” means that feel the Lord- for example – feel his providence of love, his involving among our lives)

That’s why we have to offer up everything graciously, but if we don’t stay awake, we can not offer up.

I like St. Moses so much that I often meditate on his life. However even he can’t not enter Canaan for the only one time when he did not give glory to the Lord. (anno: you can refer to the last Julia Kim’s testimony on Nov. 7, 2015) If we meditate on it, we can stay awake well.

The Blessed Mother said,

“Tell people about the family you have taken care of.”

One day, on the way to the morning Mass in Naju Parish Church via Andrew Park’s car, we saw an old lady who fell heavily backwards like a mannequin on the far side of the road. She was dead drunk and her clothes were stained with excrements and she smelled horrible. We tried to take her in the car, but she kept refusing it, saying, “No thank you.”  

At that time, there was no homily during the daily Mass in NajuParish Church and it took about only 20 minutes, so I thought that it might be better to attend the Mass first to offer up with the intention for this old lady. After Mass, I took her to my place and undressed her to bathe her. Then I found her underwear was worn out and it was splashed with feces.

I could have thrown away her dirty underpants, but I washed it insteadwith my bare hands without wearing the rubber gloves in order to offer it up as a little sacrifice for her, praying, “Lord! This world is spoiled and smells more horrible than this. Please save souls one by one, each time when I rub this panty so that this smelly world may be changed for the better.”

I took care of her at a room in the Chapel and called her “Mommy.”I treated her as I treated my mother, Then, at some time, she became proud and even asked the pilgrims for money saying, “I am Julia’s mother.” Some of the pilgrims already knew that she was not my mother but those who didn’t know blamed me for her irrational behavior.

Later, she even guided the pilgrims when I was absent. And rumors spreadall over the country. As I didn’t want many people to commit sins, I tried to rent a room in order to stay separate from her. But she said she had her own house in Shin-gwang-ri, which is located near to The Blessed Mother’s Mountain.

We went to her house and I found out that she also owned a paddy field and she seemed to be a lady of substance. I left her there and visited her from time to time. But one day when I visited her; she vanished completely as well as her house!

(anno: How can this thing happen? Julia said the old lady wasJesus. He came to Julia as the figure of the old lady to see her love and how she offers up in that situation. Therefore, it’s needed for us “To Feel from everything, otherwise everything will remain in disgrace.)

Dear pilgrims! It’s natural that many things can happen in ourlives. In this case, Jesus tested me out like that. He is just near you, that is to say those who are near you are Jesus and the Blessed Mother! If we are aware of it, how could we be distracted by others and hate each other?  

Brothers and sisters! It is so importantthat we should meditate on it always, not letting it go through into one ear and out the other ear. As the Blessed Mother of Naju said to me, “Tell people about your family. The life you have lived has not been led by yourself. I have guided and prepared it preliminarily since a long time ago”, I give my testimony to people like this. 

Julio was appointed to the advisory center in 1968 when I workedwith 4-H Club in my local area.(he became Julia’s husband a few years later)

He suggested to me toenter a contest named “Yeon-si”. (anno :Yeon-si is showing the progress of making something in front of people). I was too shy to speak before others, so I said that I could not do it, but he kept saying, “You can do it!” Eventually I entered there and presented ‘How to make apple eggs’. Unexpectedly I won the first prize and I later entered and participated in the larger competitive exhibition.

Julia performed in the contest “Yoen-si”

At that time, in Naju county Contest I performed ‘How to makecushion filling with double cocoons’ and my presentation also resulted in excellence.

Even now whenever I see the pictures of that time, I never think, ‘Idid it very well.’ but FEEL again that the Lord helped me through. I am telling you this story not to portray myself as a show-off, but to say we should feel and realize that the Lord’s grace is always with us. “Let’s “Feel” like that from everything.   

To make cushion filling, soda is needed, but my teacher told methat the soda is the c​austic soda. The judges asked me a question, “What is c​austic soda?” And I answered, “It is used to make dough rise when making breads.” Then, everyone cracked up laughing. People said, “Wow! She also has great sense of humor!” They thought that I told a joke because I answered so confidently.

I won first place again and entered the competitive exhibition of Jeonnam province. The exhibition was held for two days and I performed on the first day. After that, at lunchtime, the director of rural development administration shared his lunch box with me, saying, “Miss Youn, you did a great job.” So I thought, ‘Well??, at least, it seems not bad.’ but I won the first prize again.   

Every year the eloquent participants won the representative award,but I got the prize in the year. That was not because I did well but because the Lord prepared me in order to make me stand in front of people. See, I am unworthy and I am not a good speaker either, but they asked me to perform as a conductor among many people and I also did it.

And at the national contest which used to choose 3 winners, I became the one of the 3 prize winners and I appeared in ‘The Eco of Marching Press’ and also was on ‘Korean News’ which was broadcast at the movie theater.

The Lord prepared all these in order to use me as His instrument. The same goes for all you. The Lord also has prepared your life like this to use you as his instrument.  Therefore, let us not follow our own will but the Lord’s Will, Let us cheer up and make a new start, entrusting everything to the Lord’s Will.

The Lord and the Blessed Mother have done it!

Marian Conference in Pittsburgh, the United States in 1990

7,000 Catholics attended at the Marian Conference

A Bishop and 100 priests gave blessings

In 1990, I was invited to the Marian Conference in Pittsburgh, the United States and I went there with my husband Julio without a language translator. As I used to say, “Abortion is murder”’ abortion-rights advocates searched all Korean Americans’ residences and hotels, thus the sponsor of the Conference hid me in the American’s residence to avoid any provocation and attack on me during my visit.

When we visited Pittsburgh, on the 19^th of March, it was very cold! As cold as Gang-won-do! (A very cold area in South Korea). When I took a shower after I rubbed soap onto my body, and added shampoo into my hair, suddenly only cold water came out. I felt freezing taking a shower with cold water. Additionally to this there was only a single bed sheet on my bed, which was very thin thus I was cold, trembling and I coughing violently all night long.

In the United States, medicines can only be obtained by doctor’s prescription, however we were all very concerned about the abortion-rights advocates threats and decided that I would not take the risk of being found by them and I kept praying and just offered up my coughing and pain to the Lord during seven days, trusting that He would protect me and help me on the day of my testimony.

“Lord Jesus! I have to make a speech on the subjects of “themurder of abortion” as well as “turning our lives into prayer” here in America where the sin of abortion is so frequently committed. But if I keep coughing like this, I will not be able to do it. I offer up my cough and suffering for those who attend this Marian Congress. Please remove all the bad things and impurities from their souls and prevent me from coughing when I go up on stage.

There were a Bishiop,100 priests, 200 religious, and 7,000Catholics at the conference. When I stood up on the stage, the coughing stopped till I finished delivering messages for three and a half hours Afterwards I was interviewed by the largest n​ews paper and broadcasting company in the United States. Meanwhile the miracle of the Sun took place and continued until I left as I was told after I returned to my place after 4 o’clock.

It was not my ability but the Lord and the Blessed Mother were therewith me to be with you. At that time, numerous people got healed even though I didn’t kiss everyone of them or blew my breath into them. The crippled became able to walk, and the blind regained their sights. More than 50 men said that they would become Catholic priests, and over 50 “Thank You letters” arrived daily at the Congress premises till the day I left for Korea.

The reason that I am telling this story is this; these days I’vebeen coughing violently, today also, I continued coughing so heavily with spitting of phlegm on the way here. Julio even advised me not to extend my time with you, only to greet you and leave as he was concerned for my health as well as all the he priests. But dear pilgrims! Look at me now! I am not coughing at all! (Amen!) Because this is the pain that I am offering up for your healings, how greatful pain it is!!!”

By the way, I had a brain scan recently and the result said thatmy frontal lobe was serious. And the Lymphedema was also dangerous. Whenever I try to sleep, the severe aches on my legs require a further regimen of walking to relieve that ache. So I had to walk all night long, then I remain without any sleep.

I visited the doctor’s office in Seoul and he said that I lack dopamine and thus I had the highest level of pains. Besides, I suffered anemia from lack of iron and feel dizzy for that. So I got an injection to cure it but I got sicker since then. And on the next day when I got back home from Seoul, I went to Mt. Jiri with volunteers for Our Lady of Naju for a picnic since all of us had worked so hard to prepare for the celebration of the 30th Anniversary of Our Lady’s weeping tears in Naju. And we took a day off for that.

We should look pretty to the eyes of the Lord

But I was so ill to death, in a moment felt like staying in the car, but I rose and pretended that I was not sick at all and I climbed the mountain without rest. I got back home totally exhausted. And I started coughing and even though I went to the doctor’s office for treatment, it didn't get any better. I was ill from head to toe and I was admitted to Gwangju Hospital.

I had 2 ligaments torn in my shoulder which I got healed lasttime. I got a lump on my shoulder this time and it got bigger. When I took an X-ray examination, I found that my ligaments were damaged again. I thought that the pains were from my right thumb but the pains were due to the lump on my shoulder and doctor said to me, “Why did you let the disease grow? You need to have an operation.” So I accepted the doctor’s suggestion.

I am going to have the operation not to avoid further pain but towork more for the Lord and the Blessed Mother, and to offer up every single drop of blood to obtain the grace of healing and salvation for you.

By the way long time ago , 1980’s, when I lived in Soogang Apartment where I placed the statue of the Blessed Mother of Naju, one nun came and I found that her face got whiter. And I asked her, “What happened to your face?” then she said, “I removed the spots on my face.” So I said, “For whom you want to look pretty?” and she was not able to answer to my question. For whom should we look pretty? We should look pretty for the Lord.

When some people look for the Lord, they do not look at the Lord nailedon the Cross. Instead, they just pray their wish, “Lord! Heal this and that (here and there), let me be richer and let my children get good jobs, and bless my husband’s business so that it may prosper.” This is not right , and we should change our minds’ or way of thinking.

We should always meditateon the Lord’s Sufferings and realize that we are the sinners and think, “Jesus was nailed on the Cross and He died miserably for me. Oh, Lord! I am the sinner who made You die on the Cross.” And when we are armed with the 5 Spiritualities of Naju, we could pull out the nails that we have driven into Jesus and we will receive more additional graces from the Lord.

We should only follow the Lord and the Blessed Mother

Though I only took the basic course at the hairdressing academy and didn’t complete the whole course, I won a gold prize in the beauty art contest with the skills in hair and beauty that I just picked up from others. It is certain that the Lord has done it for His glory. Since I hired the hairdressers in my hair salon as I was more occupied with religion, people used to talk lowly of me, “That young lady hired hairdressers to earn the money and she doesn’t work at all. I bet she knows nothing about the hairdo.”

But we should think (of it as) ‘Ah, I’ve caused the Lord trouble!’” instead of saying, “How could you say that to me without knowing all the facts?” to those people who speak ill of us. We should try more not to blame others. A year after I opened a hair salon, I entered the makeup contest. While I was giving a model massage with steamed towel that was the first step of the skin care before makeup (*normal course), the other participant finished makeup-base in advance , and then took the next course - applying makeup only.

I won a silver prize and she won a gold prize in the contest. Andthe person who won a bronze prize asked me, “How much you paid for it?” “Pay for what?”, I asked back. Then she said, “How much did you pay for a silver prize?” I was so surprised to hear that. He(She) paid money for a bronze prize. Then, how about a gold prizewinner? So the next year, I entered the hair perm contest that was consisted of showing the skill of cutting hair and the finishing touches. I won a gold prize. 

Then the people who used to criticize said to me, “Oh! Pleaseforgive me (*with large gesture, bending their backs →mama Julia took their position- pilgrims laughed a lot), Mrs. Kim. I didn’t know that you are an expert and sure handed. I am so sorry.”

And I said, “Glory be to God. Lord! You are the only one Whoshould be glorified.” I won the award because the Lord helped me out in order to let me convey religion, not because I did it well by my own skill.

When I participated in the Charismatic Movement long time ago, one of the participants’ hair looked like nappy hair with curl and it really didn’t look good at all and I said to her, “I think you are pretty but you would look prettier if you have your hair cut a little bit and arranged neatly.” Then she got angry.

People speak ill of others usually behind their backs, but I giveadvices directly to others if it’s necessary for their souls. However, she reacted, “What are you talking about? We should look pretty only for the Lord and I don’t care how I look to others.” So I apologized to her. 

Despite being poor, I supported a sister-in-law and two brothers-in-lawfor their university studies. However, my mother-in-law frequently came and asked me for money, I couldn’t even buy fruits for my children. One day, my eldest son was suffering from the boil on the tip of a finger and I pulled out some violets in the alley of his wound.  And my son said to me, “Mom, it is stealing” “No, I am just pulling out some plants. It’s not stealing ” I replied. But he wanted to ask house owner’s permission whose house was in front of the alley.  So I asked the house owner if I could pull out some violets. He said to my son, “My dear, it is not stealing” then he said, “Yes, mam, all right.” 

She also allowed us to pick persimmons of which branches stretchedout over the fence of our house.

Since then, whenever Ithought of the (good) house owner, I bought the poor persimmons with the same mind of him. Therefore, how important the prayers of life are as we offer up even the things of the past.

Turning our lives into prayer is thecrystallization

that leads us to perfection

Turning our daily lives into prayers is a shortcut to quickly acquiring virtues and advancing toward the perfection and Heaven. There are a lot of things (sources) to apply this prayer of life to our ordinary daily lives. A long time ago, Fr. Antonius, Gwangju Archdiocese who was retired visited Naju.

We talked for about three hours and hesaid that the bishop of Jeju Diocese suggested him to visit the Blessed Mother of Naju. And after we finished talking, he said to me, “You are a good speaker!” “..?” Then he said, “You are such a smooth talker! By the way, people fart like this?” pulling his hand backward from his buttocks.

Then, Icaught what he meant. He just mimicked me that I used a lot of gestures while I was explaining to him how to practice “Turning our lives into prayers” When someone farts we could offer it up praying, “Lord! Please remove all bad habits of our souls that smell so horrible and fill them with the Holy Spirit!” and what a grace it is!

If we have positive viewpoint on everything, we can find more good points than bad ones. Thus we need to repent of our sins earnestly and make a new start to welcome Holy Christmas with joy. What is repentance? It means not only deeply repenting with crying, further more trying to live according to the Lord’s Will. And that is true repentance. 

On December 12, 1985, it snowed a lot and was very cold when we offered the Holy Hour Prayer devotion at the Naju Parish Church. We were praying in the pew first time but the priest suggested that we pray on the altar area, so we obeyed his advice. We offered the prayer for 4 hours on the wooden altar floor, which was chilly with wind, and one of the elderly participants said, “Julia, it’s too cold. Let’s go home.” And we finished at 3:10 a.m. 

When I was walking through an alley with two people to walk one of the participants home who lived in the remote area, three men in their 20s followed us saying, “Hey, can we talk for a sec?” So I turned around and said to them, “What do you want from a forty-year-old housewife?” One of them replied, “So what?, I don’t care” and reached his hand toward my bosom. I hit his hand instinctively. Then he reacted, “What a bitch! You want a piece of me?” and they started to beat me up.

My whole body was already frozen from four-hour praying on our knees in genuflection on the cold wooden floor, so when they kicked me in the shins, the kicks became stars to my eyes. It was so painful. I almost lost consciousness and fainted. At that moment, one of my companion shouted, “Sister!(Julia), just report to the police! That made them angrier, and they yelled, “Go ahead. Go ahead, report us, you bitch!” and they tried to hit her.

“Sorry! It was all my fault!”

So I said, “Sorry! Sorry! Hit me.” interrupting them with my arms to protect her then, the men started to punch me brutally and spat on my face. Wow, how grateful it is was! I was so glad as I wished to offer even my life to Jesus, then I could participate in the pains of Jesus by being beaten brutally like this, what other suffering could I not wish for more now !

Whenever the men kicked me, even though I shouted “ouch” in pain, I offered it up praying, “Lord! Please let the sinners repent” And when the men spat on my face, I prayed, “Lord! How much were You humiliated when the sinners made fun of You and spat on Your face? Thank You for letting me share Your suffering” And I shed tears of joy.

By the way, on second thoughts, I just could not remain glad for joining in Our Lord’s Suffering by just leaving them keep on committing sins,  “Ah, I’d better stop them from doing it anymore.” So I said to them, “Sorry! It was all my fault!” I asked for forgiveness.

What was my fault? I gave them the opportunity to commit sins because I was there.

There is no one to be blamed but myself. It wasn’t their fault but was my entire fault. And when I put my hands together in apology, the young men who were trying to harm us stood there like frozen corpses (stiffly) – without saying a word.

I patted them on the shoulder and said, “Sorry! Be good. Now, Good-Bye!” and they walked away like confused robots. Then, one of my companions said, “Julia! My coat!” There was a jacket on the ground and I thought that it was one of theirs’ and I picked it up and draped it around one of their shoulders.

If the jacket were mine, I would have given up. However, since it was not mine, I chased after them with  limping pains to get the jacket back. They turned together around at the same time like robots when I stopped them. Then I took the jacket off from one of them and said, “I am so sorry to bother you, but this jacket belongs to my friend.” When I said “You can go now”, they turned around and left in the same way. It looked like a parade of robots. I am telling you this story because I would like you to “Feel”

Actually the woman that I protected from the three men had fallen in love with a priest and they wanted to live together so the priest went back his home. But I just could not let her ruin a priest and I persuaded her to give him up. Eventually the priest could persevere in his priesthood so far. However, he still doesn’t know about the fact because I didn’t tell him about it.

While we were walking home, she said to me, “What on earth did you do wrong? All you did was praying to the Lord. And how could He just let you get beaten up severely like this instead of helping you?” She couldn’t understand why I apologized to the young men though I was beaten up. And I told her that the Lord’s law is different from that of the human beings and how I was grateful being beaten up. I also told about the graces that I received from the Lord and the Blessed Mother. But she said that she still didn’t get it.

So I kept telling her about it for a long time and she said, “Okay. I guess I know what you mean, Julia!” I tried to express her relation with the priest indirectly. Then I got back home at 4 a.m. and I found that the three iron pots were burned while I was working at the beauty shop. I used to do finishing touches for my customers with a hair dryer for free offering up the prayers of life that sometimes I forgot that I placed the pots on the stove and got them burned. 

I offered up the three young men to the Lord while I was scrubbing the pots. When they (the pots) turned white, I prayed, “Oh, Lord! Thanks for turning their souls white as snow though their sins are red like crimson. Remove their chronic bad habits completely and wash their souls so that they may rush to You.” When I scoured out the less burnt pot, I offered up the little sinnersand when I scoured out the more burnt pot, I offered up the big sinners, scrubbing them harder.

Let’s entrust everything to the Lord entirely

without worrying about the results

Jesus said, “Don’t worry about the results.” I always don’t worry about results and entrust everything to the Lord entirely. So I believe that the three young men got baptized and they are now in the Lord’s bosom though I even don’t know their names. And I cleaned from my beauty shop to far side of the road offering up the prayer of life and entered home.

At that moment, my husband woke up and I said to him, “Julio! I’ve got complete confidence in Jesus today!” “What do you mean?” And I told him what happened after the Holy Hours Prayer devotion. Then he suddenly and got up with a jump and just raised his hand. I thought he was about to hit me since I’ve heard that husbands beat up wives who were beaten up outside. So I prepared myself closing my eyes. But he grasped my hands tightly with joy, saying, “Congratulations, honey!” and my joy became doubled.

That day, when I was doing the laundry and she came to me againand said, “Julia, Julia! I couldn’t sleep at all, because I didn’t understand what you meant. I just can’t understand it. What did we do wrong to the Lord? We’ve prayed for 4 hours on the chilly alter kneeling and raising arms. But how could He let you get beaten up far from helping you out?” 

I didn’t sit down to talk with her, but I shook off the launderedclothes to spread open straight and hang them neatly while I was offering up prayers of life continuously for her. I explained to her in detail about the sinless Lord’s suffering pains of the whipping and scourging, and the passion to death and Love for the sake of our salvation.

Thus I talked to her of various spiritual things. She eventuallycame to “Feel” the Lord’s and the Blessed Mother’s love and she said to me, “Julia, now I understand! Thank you!” at last she left the priest indefinitely and got married to a farmer. She chose a poor farmer so as to do the penance for her past wrongs. But she has led a happy marriage with kids until now. How joyful news it is! 

To Feel is very important. If she didn’t come to Our Lady of Naju,she would not get the “feel”

Feel it, dear pilgrims !

We should be aware of thanksgiving and loving, and if you put yourself in the shoes of the other person, we could understand others well. If we are not self-centered, but put ourselves in the shoes of other people, we could understand others well.

Jesus wants to live within us. However, He cannot enter our hearts because we don’t open our hearts to Him. From now on, let’s drive out all the bad things from our hearts so that we may welcome the baby Jesus and the Blessed Mother with our hearts wide open!
Thank you. I love you so much!

Click : Excerpts from Julia Kim’s Testimony on Dec. 5, 2015 (pdf)