The excerpts from Julia Kim’s Testimony
on March 5, 2016 

Praise the Lord! Praise the Blessed Mother!

I am so unworthy that I don’t know what to say. I have participated in the suffering and death of Jesus on the Cross for a long time and I even experienced death at the Twelfth Station on the Way of the Cross twice(April 22, 2011, April 18, 2014), but I never thought that I suffered the same pains as the Lord did. The simple and humble soul takes the messages of the Lord and the Blessed Mother as they are. (Amen!)  

On March 2, I have suffered pain on behalf of the Lord and the Blessed Mother, for the sake of those who raised objections to the message of the Blessed Mother which was received on February 17. I suffered pains from my head and it felt just like a volcano erupting with bubbles.

“my head felt very hot as if it were burning and I thought my head would burst. I had never experienced such extreme pain before. It felt just like a volcano erupting. At that time, I had been lying on a big chair and rubbing onto my head a wonder medicine given by Jesus. Bubbles as well as Black matter gushed out of my head.” –Julia’s explanation

She suffered extreme pains of her brain being burned out in reparation for the sins in our thoughts. Then Black color body fluid like totally burned ashes came out of her head
 

While I was suffering the pain for the repentance of the people who doubted the message of the Blessed Mother, devils jumped on me and attacked me in their attempt to stop my offering up the pain, by beating and scratching me. My flesh was twisted up and my whole body became a mass of wounds.

At that moment, the Blessed Mother gave me the message. And one of my helpers took pictures of me when I was attacked by devils. The pictures showed the scenes of my body being wounded, bruised, distorted, and flowing with sweat. I suffered pains not only spiritually but also physically like this.

Julia’s body being wounded and bruised (left) and
her waist and spine being distorted (right) by devil’s attack

There is no grace if we close our minds obstinately

Because of the sins of homosexuality and obscenity, I offer up the pains of my anus almost every day, and I also offer up the pains of reparation for abortion and my abdomen keeps swelling. It is because so many people, regardless of gender and age, commit the sin of obscenity with obscene thoughts and underwent abortions recently. As a result, I suffer the pains not only in my anus but also in my vagina. Do you know why?

This is because so many people masturbate which the Lord forbids us to do. But the devils keep inciting the people to masturbate. Though I suffer pains in my anus and vagina, I consider them as pains that would hopefully make even one sinner repent and be saved. So I graciously offer up my pains and do my best without even saying “Ouch!” (Amen!)

People practice masturbation or have extra-marital affairs because they don’t get satisfaction from their spouses. If you close your minds obstinately, God’s grace will never flow into you no matter how much I offer up the pains for you. Therefore let us cut off the obscene thoughts completely, today.

On the first Saturday of October in 2013, I was in a critical condition for multiple organ dysfunction syndromes due to acute septicemia. The symptom has started since noon. From 2 pm onwards, it became worse and my blood pressure went down to 40 and my body temperature rose up to 41C or 42C. I was in sepsis shock and I might die soon. In spite of this critical moment, I didn’t even know it.

And one of my helpers called to ask her daughter who was a nurse about my symptom and she answered that it was acute sepsis and I had to go to the hospital immediately. Because I earnestly wanted to see you, I called Peter (Representitive of Naju volunteers)and said, “I will arrive at the Blessed Mother’s Mountain in time by any means” because I wish to do anything that can make you happy (such as “joining here anyhow.”).

My body was distorted and I could hardly breathe.  While I was struggling in severe pains, my testimony time passed, so I called Peter and said, “I will go there in time for the meeting with the pilgrims.” But I was not able to make it and I called Peter again and said, “I will go to just wave my hand when the pilgrims are leaving.” After all I could not come here.

That day, I intended to attend the prayer meeting by any means and Albino who was supposed to drive me here stood by all day long . Eventually Peter came to my place after the prayer meeting finished. I said to both of them, “Go get some sleep.” and I sent them away. I could go to the hospital at that time, but since my helpers stayed with me all daylong and I was concerned for their tiredness and I decided to let them go get some rest.

I suffered the pains till they got up after resting and when I was taken to the hospital by the ambulance, it was well over 8 p.m. The doctor told us to prepare for my funeral as he felt it was too late to do anything for me. Though I asked the nurses to put an oxygen mask over me through my gesturing and moaning, “Um, um.” in ICU but they didn’t even listen to me.

We receive more graces when we lay down our lives.

Though I was dying, they didn’t put an oxygen mask over me, so I prayed and offered up my pains, “Lord! Take my life and save all your children in this world.” Then, I got better day-by-day and I was able to breathe gradually after 5 days. Only then did the nurse put an oxygen mask over me, saying, “Never remove it.”

They put it over me because they thought I was supposed to survive but I removed it saying, “I could breathe myself, now.” At that time, I suffered kidney, lung and liver failures due to multiple organ dysfunction syndrome. I suffered heart attack as well and my liver index rose up to 900 and I might die soon.

However all my organs got back to normal and I survived and everybody was so surprised. I am telling you this, because I would like you to offer up your pains graciously instead of complaining and blaming on others. Then you will receive graces from the Lord. I have always offered up sufferings but I never thought that I survived because I offer my pains graciously.

At that time Dr. Hong who was my doctor, was so glad about my recovery and said, “How could it happen?” and I said, “I was diagnosed with terminal cancer which the lumps even protruded out of my anus and between my toes. I was waiting for death at that time. But I got healed completely after I heard the Lord’s voice at a Catholic church. Then Dr. Hong said, “Oh, then you are saved again this time! You must have many lives.”

I got new lease of life like this. By the way, you’ve seen in the pictures that my hands were swollen when my abdomen swelled up immensely in reparation of sins of abortion. I also realized that my both hands were swollen like that and people said that the patients who are dying from kidney failure have that kind of symptom. And it means that I was suffering pains in reparation for the sin of abortion even while I was dying.

Even she was on the brink of death due to septicemia with her hands swollen out,
she was offering up the pains of atoning for the sins of abortion.

Everyone! I know that you suffer from inner and outer pains but let’s offer them graciously up to the Lord and the Blessed Mother. I am an unworthy sinner who only has shame but I will offer up all the pains willingly for you and I hope that all of you get healed.

Being disappointed or discouraged is giving joy to devils.

The devils of obscenity are really wicked. They just come and incite us covertly, “Ah, Don’t you want to do something? How about masturbating?” Many of you might have experienced it. And you think, “No, I won’t.” but devils keep inciting and tempt you to masturbate. And your guardian angel says, “No! It’s an impious sin against the Lord!” Then devils say, “Jesus will forgive you if only you do it just once.” And they seduce you to enjoy sensual pleasure but we have to resist the temptation. (Amen!)

Even if you committed that sin, please never be disappointed or discouraged. Let’s offer up to the Lord and the Blessed Mother our faults seeking for fleeting pleasure and pick ourselves up and start anew. (Amen!!!)

Let’s throw away all the bad friends such as pride, ego, envy and jealousy. We could even ruin our lives because of them, so let’s pull them by the roots and drive out the devils of obscenity completely. (Amen!!!)

And we are not supposed to judge anyone. This person might have the merits that the other person does not, and that person might have the merits which this person does not have. Everyone has his or her own unique talents and shortcomings. So we are not supposed to leave anyone out and we should always try to embrace him or her with love and utilize our advantage.

However, the devils of division always try to attack the children of the Lord and the Blessed Mother. So how about preparing the general confession during the Lent of this year? It is important that we take care of the graces well that we received from the Lord and the Blessed Mother and remain awake. Let me tell you the story about general confession.

There was one sister, who belonged to Jung-hung parish church of the Gwangju Archdiocese. She had previously participated in six seminars of the Charismatic movement. She was interested in belonging to my group from the beginning, but had never been placed in my group. Upon enrolling for the 7th time, she thought to herself ‘If I can’t join Julia’s group this time, I’ll give up the registration fee of 5,000 won and never attend the seminar again.’ But, to her great surprise, she was placed in my group on her seventh try.

At first time when I saw her, she had so gloomy look, so I talked with her and realized that her heart was filled with anger. That’s why she was not born again in love even though she had received the charisms of "praying in the Holy Spirit" (such as praying in tongues), making prophecies, and healing during the past 6 seminars. Every day during the seminars, she had gotten up early around 6 in the morning, showered with cold water even in the winter and participated in the seminar with her utmost sincerity. Then she had even received many charisms, but she had always felt an emptiness in a corner of her heart because she hadn’t been able to forgive her husband and her son and hated them.

Before marriage, her husband was attracted to her and committed sexual abuses against her making her pregnant. Because of this, she had no other choice but to marry him and gave birth to a son. Thinking that she couldn’t marry another man who had good conditions because of the son who was conceived against her will, she always beat him and hated her husband so much. Her husband, who was short, and not very handsome, and also disabled in one arm.      

It is my fault because I was there!

After hearing her story, I said, “Sister!” “You said you were sexually assaulted, but he did not take you to an unknown place at that time and how did a disabled man without a deadly weapon commit sexual abuses against a healthy woman? Would it not have been possible that you yourself provided some of the causes. Isn’t it true that you didn’t want it in the beginning, but later felt pleasure during the assault, so you then laid yourself down to him?” She said in reply, “I acknowledge it.” Before then nobody told this to her, but blamed only him. That’s the reason why she could not open her heart. (she couldn’t realize her fault)

Even when we are hit by a flying rock while standing still, it was our fault because I was hit for being there. We wouldn’t have been hit if we moved even a little bit away from the rock. Likewise, as you were with him at that time, you became pregnant. Therefore, accept it as “it is my-fault.” Then she said “Yes, you are right.” “Because you think he is disabled and isn’t suitable for being your spouse, you have always blamed him and complained, haven’t you?” “I think you are right. I have continuously despised him, thinking that I had been better educated than he, had more abilities than he, had a better appearance than he, and have been forcefully taken advantage of by him." “Sister! What if you had married someone who was healthier, had a higher social status, and was richer than your husband but did not really love you, got involved in extramarital affairs, and despised you?"

"Oh, my! That is true.” She then began crying. Even though the situation hasn’t changed, how we think makes a great deal of difference. It reverse’s our lives. Since that time, she cried with repentance and started to changed. It’s one of the Five Spiritualities of Naju, “IT’S MY FAULT” that she accepted. In addition, I asked “As you hated your husband so much, you made food for him with anger and fury, saying “damn it, what a state I am in because of marrying him!’, didn’t you?” She acknowledged it as well. “Sister, how good it can be if you pray when you cook like this : “Jesus! Mama Mary! Be with me so that I may cook delicious food for my husband and my children. Like all the seasonings and ingredients in this food I am harmoniously mixing, let those who eat this food form unity in love”. I taught her how to turn our daily lives into prayers.

The Grace of general confession

The next day, she said she had made a general confession and put out thick papers, saying “I have written all the sins that I have committed since I was a child.”

Brothers and sisters, it is important to repent and write our sins we have committed even if there may be something missing.

Burning the papers she handed over to me, I prayed “Jesus, burn her wounds and her every movement with your flame of love so that her family may become a happy and holy family in love.”

On the third day, she visited me with her husband. He brought me a dustpan that he made himself. “I really wanted to give you something that I made myself, so I brought you this”, I received it with thanks thinking that ‘I’ll sweep every evil and dirty thing of our souls into this dustpan (She is practicing ‘Turning our daily lives into Prayers’). He was so grateful that his wife completely changed 180 degrees. He let me listen to him.

She had never told him where she went or where she was coming from for about 10 years because of her anger and hatred of him. After meeting me in Naju, she said to her husband “ I just came back from Naju.” And then the next day again “Honey, I’m going to Naju.” One day then after returning and saying “I came back from Naju”, and then suddenly she spread a mat on the floor.”

He was so embarrassed at misunderstanding that she was trying to consummate before their son. But she asked him and their son to sit on the mat and bowed down to the ground (Korean style to respect someone or beg for forgiveness) four times, asking for forgiveness “I have been seriously wrong to you both so far.”

Even if the son was born because of them and had no fault about his birth, she beat and hated him (as she thought she had to get married because of him). His birth, however, turned into grace at the moment. “My son, I am so sorry! Honey, I am so sorry! Though I have lived well by marrying you, I have hated and detested you so far. Please forgive me!” Then they all embraced each other and cried a lot.

Let us enjoy eternal happiness in Heaven on the last day

They shared true love with one another for the first time since the marriage by filling the hole in their hearts caused by the wounds, with love, and experienced happiness of a true family and great love of God.

Therefore, it is difficult to enter Heaven if we don’t repent of our sins and faults.

In the time of Noah so many people laughed, ridiculed and made sarcastic remarks to and at Noah until the moment he boarded the ark. As soon as he and his family entered the ark and closed the door, it rained like cats and dogs and the deluge began. Although Noah could not fully understand God’s word, he responded with “Amen” and made the ark for 100 years and then went to Heaven with his family.

Accordingly if people are fettered by laws, insisting upon their trifling knowledge, theories and reasoning, they will never be able to earn the Heavenly Kingdom. But you responded with Amen to the word of the Lord and the Blessed Mother and took on board the Mary’s Ark of Salvation.

Brothers and sisters! Let us entrust all of ourselves to the Lord and the Blessed Mother and turn away from sins and hold the hands of the Blessed Mother who is the string that ties Heaven and earth together and enjoy the eternal happiness in Heaven on the last day.